By Adrienne Rich
“We are within the presence the following of an enormous American poet whose voice at mid-century in her personal existence is more and more marked by means of ethical passion.”—New York occasions booklet Review
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Translated by way of Susanne de Lotbiniere-Harwood
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Additional info for A Wild Patience Has Taken Me This Far: Poems 1978-1981
My family taught me our culture's rules and beliefs ab out love . " T o demystify the m eaning of love, the art an d practice of lovi ng, we need to use sound definitio ns of love when talk ing with children, and we a lso need to ens ure that lovi ng action is never tainted wit h abuse. L ABOUT L OVE rights, it is absolutel y crucial that parenting adults learn how to offer loving discipline . Setting boundaries and teaching children how to set boundaries for themselves prior to misbehavior is an essential part of loving parenting.
As they grow older they respond to affectionate care by giving affection, cooing at the sight of a welcomed caretaker. Affection is only one ingredient of love. To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients-care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication. Learning faulty definitions of love when we are quite young makes it difficult to be loving as we grow older. We start out committed to the right path but go in the wrong direction.
Unlike wo men who can organize to protest sexist domina tion, demanding both equal rights and justice, children can only rely on wellmeaning adults to assist them if they are being exploited and oppressed in the home. We all know that, irrespective of class or race, other adults rarely intervene to question or challenge what their peers are doing with "their" children. At a fun party, mostly of educated, well-paid professionals, a multiracial, multigenerational evening, the subject of disciplining kids by hitting was raised.